Song of the Week 12/16 - 12/21

Song: Chinese Translation
M. Ward - Chinese Translation

I love this song...I love the unique sound and the smile it brings in the depths of it's heavy subject...hope you enjoy...



Lyrics:
I sailed a wild, wild sea
Climbed up a tall, tall mountain
I met a old, old man
Beneath a weeping willow tree
He said now if you got some questions
Go and lay them at my feet
But my time here is brief
So you'll have to pick just three

And I said
What do you do with the pieces of a broken heart
And how can a man like me remain in the light
And if life is really as short as they say
Then why is the night so long
And then the sun went down
And he sang for me this song

See I once was a young fool like you
Afraid to do the things
That I knew I had to do
So I played an escapade just like you
I played an escapade just like you
I sailed a wild, wild sea
Climbed up a tall, tall mountain
I met an old, old man
He sat beneath a sapling tree
He said now if you got some questions
Go and lay them at my feet
But my time here is brief
So you'll have to pick just three

And I said
What do you do with the pieces of a broken heart
And how can a man like me remain in the light
And if life is really as short as they say
Then why is the night so long
And then the sun went down
And he played for me this song

What do you do on snow days???

I do bad ass stuff on snow days....

5 Top Radio and I made a podcast baby of laughter

Last Friday, Joe Wilson(Funny Los Angeles Comedian/Radio Host/Air Seller) and Robert Yashumura
(Funny Los Angeles Comedian/Radio Host/Cool-glasses-wearer) asked me and fellow Portland Comic, Jesse Alison to be guests on their Los Angeles based Comedy Podcast, 5 Top Radio. A fun time was had by all. Black jesus, a goat with huge balls, Jesse leading a sing along, Joes flaming neighbor, Robert Ironing, and daytime bar-dwelling were just some of the topics riffed upon. Click below to hear the rest!

You can also listen to past and upcoming guests here



Also...if you just can't get enough of Podcasts cross pollenating with yours truly, you can find any blog talk podcast I've been on here

R.I.P. Bettie Page 1923 - 2008

"I was not trying to be shocking, or to be a pioneer. I wasn’t trying to change society, or to be ahead of my time. I didn’t think of myself as liberated, and I don’t believe that I did anything important. I was just myself. I didn’t know any other way to be, or any other way to live."

Bettie Page



Bondage Glamazon. Exotic. Pop Culture Icon. Bad Girl. Pin-Up Legend. Survivor. Fresh-Faced Beauty. Fetish. Missionary. Proud. Naughty But Nice. Dance Movie Star. Forbidden. Misunderdstood. Revolutionary. Dark Angel. Brain. Playboy Centerfold. Fantasy. Preacher. Girl In The Leopard Print Bikini.



That Smile.



Rest In Peace Bettie Page April 22, 1923 - December 11, 2008.

I Googled Blank.

I google imaged 'Burrito Boy' (a small burrito joint that we ate at in Eugene, OR that had the BEST burritos ever at 2:30a.m.) to send to a friend to make her smile and all I got was a picture of this baby donkey. Now I want a burrito (both the food and the donkey).

Song of the Week 12/8

This song has a personal meaning to it. A very good friend and one of my favorite people was recently going through a very hard time. He was very sick and I did everything I could to help him. I am happy to say that he is getting much better now, and he said this song was for me. Therefore, my inner attention whore would like to make this song my song of the week.

'Angel'
By: Massive Attack

Lyrics:

You are my angel
Come from way above
To bring me love
Her eyes
She's on the dark side
Neutralize
Every man in sight
To love you, love you, love you ...
You are my angel
Come from way above
To love you, love you, love you ...

Freak Show Comedy at Mt. Tabor

I would like to remind my 4 readers that I am hosting a Thursday night comedy open mic every thursday at 9pm at Portlands Mt. Tabor Theaters' Legacy Lounge.

Every comic gets 6 minutes in 'the pit' (the stage is a little below the audience...it feels funny, but good - think back to the first time you watched grandma porn).

It's a fun, VERY COLD (bring a jacket and be prepared to drink lots of whiskey) room with a lot of potential. The atmosphere is blacklights and freak. Sideshow sex came all over the walls of this place making it one of the more interesting rooms.



Please tell everyone. I might even show you a boob.

Mt. Tabor Theater - Legacy Lounge
Every Thursday - sign up by 9pm - Always Free - 21+ - Freezing cold venue.

I Googled Blank.

I google imaged the word 'Calm' and this came up:



So new age. Hot.

I love google image. I'll be doing posts like this often.

Song of the Week 12/1

By Ida Maria....Better when you're naked. I cannot stop listening to this empowering, fun song.



Lyrics:

Oh the clever
things I should say to you
They got stuck somewhere
Stuck between me and you

Oh I'm nervous
I don't know what to do
Light a cigarrette
I only smoke when I'm with you

What the hell do I do this for?
You're just another guy
OK, you're kind of sexy
But you're not really special

But I won't mind
If you take me home
Come on, take me home

I won't mind
if you take off all your clothes
Come on, take them off

'Cause I like you so much better when you're naked
I like me so much better when you're naked
I like you so much better when you're naked
I like me so much better when you're naked

The Roast of Auggie Smith

Monday, November 17th, 2008 at The Fez Ballroom



When the clock strikes 8pm, puffs of cigarette smoke, sorted drunken comparisons of the star of the nights' coital prowess, and clinking of vodka-filled glasses will cease momentarily as a man...not a tall man, nor a man clad with hair...but a man whos years of experience, amplified opinions of his observations, and a point of view so honest and funny..it has been known to change an entire life in one night, will step onto the stage and take a seat on the throne. What will happen next is likely to be a moment that will go down in some peoples' history (via their digital camera if they're too wasted) and will not be a night forgotten for those of us who know, admire, and at times secretly wish a bruised funny bone to this man.

This man I speak of is the one and only Auggie Smith. If you don't know the name...google it. Comedy Central, Last Comic Standing, etc...(I've already taken 3 Tylenol PM's and I don't feel like copy and pasting his bio from google).

I love Auggie Smith like an insestual older brother...although I am one of few who can say that I do not know Auggie in the bible sense. As much as I respect and treasure this man, I can not WAIT to see his ass get roasted tomorrow night.

I was told tonight that at the roast of Auggie Smith, no comic is safe (I can only hope that something smarter than 'whore' will be hurled at me or the other lady comics)...but the man of the hour, Auggie, is who I will be focusing on. I am waiting for the precise moment that Auggie - with his stoic demeanor breaks. Now...don't get me wrong, Auggie will eat it up...he will laugh and enjoy himself. I have just never been in the presence of Auggie showing outward discomfort and I can't wait.

I am equally as excited to see the roasters. For those of you that love googling...Troy Thirdgill, Art Krug, Susan Rice, Andy Andrist, Ron Osborne, Jessa Reed, Richard Bain, Kristine Levine, Keith Wallan, Eddie Van Ness, Lonnie Bruhn, Virginia Jones, Holli Pappan, Arlo Stone, and many many more.

The prodigious Dax Jordan will will be the Roast Master for this enchanting evening.



Fez Ballroom - Burnside & SW 11th - 8pm - 21+ - $6

One of many favorite moments with Mr. Auggie Smith.
The Setting: Melissa and my apartment - Downtown Portland - December. Melissa and I decided to throw an ugly Christmas sweater party. Many comics and friends attended. Katie had brought a unicorn pinata to the Christmas party because she loves to tease my unicorn libido, and - what is more fitting and appropriate than a pinata at a Christmas party? After watching few failed attempts at breaking the pinata in the barren living room of our apartment...Auggie Smith decided to -with the help of 'broom holder', Richard Bain - take matters into his own hands by grabbing a 2 x 4 and showing us how bald men get things done.

I don't think further explanation is necessary:

Yes We Can

I wrote this on November 5th, 2008.

Last night we witnessed history. It doesn't matter if you vote Donkey, Elephant or other...history was made.

We have all been affected in different ways by this nonsensical 8 year reign of inefficiency, irresponsibility, and incompetence. I say that with little bias towards either party. When you get down to it, although I am personally very pleased with this elections' results...this isn't about who won and who didn't, this is about realizing that there is a huge problem, and about finding a way to make a change.

Sarah, I'm proud of you for not completely losing it onstage, you stayed much stronger up there than I had given you credit for. And Todd looked Kinda hot. (wink).

Although I did not vote for, nor did I wish to see McCain/Palin in office this year, after watching his gracious and benevolent speech last night, I have much respect and admiration for John McCain. His speech was moving, well written, and full of hope in a moment of defeat. He took the high road and asked his fellow republicans and fellow Americans to put individual pride aside, and join him, and the rest of us, in coming together as one to make, and help our new president (who has a BIG mess to clean up) make this country a better place. Kudos to you, Mr. McCain.

In MY opinion, the situation that we're currently in, isn't "The Republican/Democrat/Pagan messed up"...bottom line, George W. Bush fucked up.

We need to realize this, accept it, and move on to make a change.

One of the most important virtues that we have as individuals, communities, and societies is Self Accountability. I am well aware that many times Bush is a puppet in his show, and that not all of his words/actions come from his true beliefs or feelings, but he is the Commander in Chief...and when you're the boss, you are often times responsible for actions that you allow to happen under your administration. So, for those few stubborn and angry republicans that I've talked to this morning - you can either cry about it and throw a pity party, place blame everywhere you can (DO NOT AIM DIRECTLY AT YOURSELF OR AT BUSH), and lay on the ground stomping your hands and feet whining "not fair! not fair! not fair!" OR you can accept the fact that Bush wasn't the right captain of your team, move on, dry your eyes and do something about it.

I have no way of knowing George W's true intentions when entering the White House...I could go off of my assumptions, but I think our parents taught us all what ASSuming will make you (even if you're pretty damn sure your assumption is correct)...he may have thought he could handle the job, he may have - in his "heart" of hearts - genuinely wanted to be a leader, but all he ended up doing was turning this country into a board game. We are not Monopoly, we are not Battleship, and we are not Clue (It was Bush, in Iraq, with an Oil Barrel!). We are the UNITED States of America and we are in dire need of change. It blows my mind at the excuses that people are making for this man. "Well, the economy has always fluctuated every so many years, Bush just happens to be in office for this fluctuation"....ummm....so....let me make sure I'm understanding this correctly - we are in the worst economic crisis/recession (depression) that we have been in this century, among all of the other messes that have been made, with an imbecilic man in charge, and you would like me to believe that this is just a coincidence?? You'd have an easier time convincing me that the Bush Family is actually friends with Al Qaeda or Osama Bin Laden and that all of this is fueled by money, oil, and rawhide. Oh wait....

Again, this isn't about Red vs. Blue anymore, it's so much bigger than that. You can still love your 'team' and know that you need a new player. For example (on a MUCH, MUCH smaller scale), I am a huge San Francisco Giants fan...in 1993, beloved All-Star and fan favorite, Will Clark left the team. They rotated players in and out of the position until 1995 when the Giants decided to put a young man by the name of J.R. Phillips on first. He came into the position with what seemed to be hope and ambition. By the end of that season, Phillips was arguably the worst 1st baseman in Giants history. (.194/.252/.355 with the rest of the NL's average at .277/.345/.458 for any of you baseball nerds out there). Did you see people defending Phillips? Sure, probably. However, the majority of the fans said "You are not right for this job, we love our team, and we need a change if we're going to win, we gave you a chance, and you aren't right for this...we need someone with the 'right moves' to represent our team" and even if the new player we needed had to come from our arch rival team, the Dodgers (gag), we still would have accepted the change because it needed to happen. You can still love your team and realize that Georgey boy wasn't the right player. If you accept this, change can happen sooner.

Last night, while watching the speeches of Mc Cain and Obama, we were all moved for so many different reasons...on top of our economy, our eco-system, human & equality rights, and ending this war....when Obama spoke of change in the Healthcare system, I was overcome with a sense of relief, anger, and just pure emotion. I had been very sick off and on, the last few years...and although I am MUCH healthier now, my past has been riddled with tens of thousands of dollars worth of tests, procedures, doctor/urgent care/E.R. Visits, etc...I am 26 years old, I have a good paying job, I have insurance (now) - and I am the most broke I've ever been, I was sued by a medical collections agency, I almost lost my job, and I am being forced to file for emergency bankruptcy in order to stop the lawsuit/keep my job...all of this hell, these feelings of being angry, scared, and alone, sleepless nights, and a fear of answering your phone...all because I got sick. I am a very strong person, and I know that I have it A LOT easier than other people who are suffering right now, or who have suffered in the past due to our backwards and often times asinine system. I can get through this...I can see the light at the end of my scarred road...but what about those people who can't? I feel for them, and I want to help make a change for them.

For those of you who wanted to, or attempted to cheapen someone's moment of happiness, relief, and inspiration last night, maybe you could try some reflection (message me if you need any of these words to be defined or used in another sentence) and realize that this was and is monumental for some of us who have suffered because of our inept system...let us have our moment. I wont get in your "Fuck the MAN!" or "I have my own reasons (that I'm not gonna tell anybody cause they might not be true) why I don't vote!" bubble, if you stay out of mine. I try to always understand where other people are coming from, I am very open minded, I listen, and I try to learn...I love how communication can help you open your eyes wider to something that you never would have seen before...but you and I aren't going to see eye to eye on this one, buddy, and how dare you attempt to take that away from the rest of us. P.S., Santa isn't real.

I guess all in all, what I'm saying is...let's get real with what's what and move on. We have elected a new president! George W. Bush is going to be gone (I'm woo-hooing so loud inside right now)! Let's DO this...we can't go back in time and change the votes, so for you that are republican and/or McCain/Palin fans (not all of you, mainly just the ones who are spreading hate, jealousy, revenge, and/or animosity) - I hope that you can accept the facts. McCain put up a good fight, and was graciously defeated...that's that. So instead of fighting Obama, I really hope that we can agree to disagree on some things, and help to amplify and boost the things we do agree on, and fight to make a change...we are people first.

P.S. I found this. Destiny gave this to me:

Sowwie

Ok...so sometimes people are assholes, whether they mean to be or not...I am an asshole because I have been depriving my 3 readers of bloggery since late summer...and for that, I am sorry.

There have been oh so many things that have violated (both in the fun and not so fun way) my life over the last few months...I suppose I'll have to catch you up.

This could be fun...or...extremely damaging and one of the reasons for my premature entrance into the mental facility that I have already picked out. (If there's one thing the boy scouts taught me - besides how to make a really awesome bong for my brother for his birthday - it was Always Be Prepared!).

Here are just a few gems you have to look forward to, my friends...

* Vodka called, she wants me back.

* The No-Neck Club.

* Ass Camera Lawsuit(wish it was a) Musical!

* Mr. Right - Finally! Oh wait, you were kidding?

* My Halloween as Bristol Palin.

* Yes We Can.

* Freak Show Comedy - My new open mic.

* The roast of Auggie Smith

* Female Comics invade Eugene, OR.

Well...it looks like I've got a lot of writing to do...and I'd like to finish some of it before this Tylenol PM kicks in completely.

So once again, I'm sorry for neglecting you - my blog, my sweet angel - and my few, but very appreciated readers.

xoxo

Because it's Friday Night....

You know when you're like "Man, it's Friday night...I'm kind of bored, but I don't know what to do..."? Well, lucky for you, we've got a great show at the Bagdad Theater in Portland tonight! (I wanted to make that as cheesey as possible...mission acomplished, I assume)

This is the poster that I wanted to use to promote the show:


This idea was brutally rebuffed by my friend, John who told me that I could not post that anywhere. He went on to make me a new poster. It only took him 5 tries to get all the spelling correct (he's Canadian) but he finally did it....



This fabulous show will be hosted by yours truley, and will be featuring, all the way from Seattle, Miss Danielle Radford:



www.myspace.com/danielleradford

Portland's own, Kyle Harbert



www.myspace.com/kyleharbert

and last, but certainly not least, another Seattleite, Solomon Georgio



www.myspace.com/solomongeorgio

We would love to see you tonight at 10pm, $5 at the door, and the show is 21+, which means you can drink. Get drunk and laugh harder.

How to pay a bill when you're pissed off.

I love this....

In an Absolut world...

Zach Galifianakis and I would be married or bf and gf or just best friends forever...but until that happens...I want to share what I see as pure hilarity, and beauty...





and finally, brand new...EPISODE THREE!!!! YAY!



(P.S. You can also check out more Zach sketches at www.funnyordie.com)

You're welcome.

Dragons?

It's too hot to think today, so I'm going to post up an old blog of mine from another place. The main reason I like this blog is because of the hilarious arguments this starts between D&D and science geeks (whom I LOVE). Please Enjoy...

Do you think dragons were ever real? I mean, I get it, Dinosaurs were BEFORE dragons, so they def. would have found a dragon skeleton by now...but what if they actually have found a skeleton and the scientists were like "Crap.. we have NO idea what kind of dinosaur this is...ok, ok, ummm...ok, let's just name it something dinosaur-y sounding, and act confident, and people will believe it" OR since Dragons blew and breathed fire, maybe they had like a huge battle and they all killed eachother via cremation (wich would leave no bones, only teeth, which could be mistaken for a dinosaur's) untill there was only one left and we still haven't found his bones yet....wow..what if???

I'm just sayin...

Zoogestions

What kind of world do we live in when the Zoo doesn't have koala bears? WHAT A WORLD! (enraged fists towards the sky). Seriously though, the Portland Zoo doesn't have koala bears (or camels, or big turtles). Penguins make up for some of the missing animals, but still. I'm just a little sore about it. Or maybe I just wanted an excuse to blog...who knows. Don't judge me (to my face).

PRCM - Episode 2

Yay! It's up!

Episode 2 of the Pop Rock Candy Mountain Show is up! Maria Bamford, Andy Kindler, Marc Maron are the guests, and this is my co-hosting 'debut' (so fancy). The topic is The Rules of Comedy.

Simply visit: www.poprockcandymountain.com , sit back and enjoy.

(Remember, it's a call-in show, so sometimes the sound gets a little weird, like when guests go into the fridge to get some string cheese, or go outside for a cigarette break....but all in all, it's very entertaining).

There's still hope for me!

I might not be alone forever! (Although, I am a bit older than most of the others)

http://www.marryourdaughter.com/index.php

Wow. I don't have any other words...just wow.

Happy 7th of July!

Hey kiddo's...sorry I haven't written. They don't have computers on the wagon. Ok...they do, but I just wanted to say that.

I hope you all had a fabulous time on the 4th. I spent it watching people get drunk (with jealousy oozing out of me) at comedy shows and bars, then I watched movies and ate carrots. It was nice (in a barnyard-animal-watches movies sorta way).



This morning was hard to get up...after a long beautiful, glorious, wonderful, amazingly nice 3 day weekend...I woke up in a 'go ahead...talk to me before noon, I dare you...I'll bitch slap you with my words so fast you'll be crying like a baby who just got bit by a llama at a petting zoo' kinda mood and I could've done so thanks to freedom of speech.

Happy Independence Days.



Oh, and I hope none of you over the age of 10 were stupid enough to blow your fingers off...but knowing the people I know...I'm sure some of you did. Get well soon.

Healthy Shmealthy

Alright, so after all of the festivities of my 2 week birthday extravaganza, my body was screaming for a break. I'm on day 3 of no alcohol, cigarettes, caffeine, or fried and processed foods. I was feeling great until a few hours ago.

I have a headache. I want a cigarette. I would really love a drink after work. No caffeine and no crap food, I can handle...but no cigarettes and no drinking on a night that I don't have to work tomorrow sucks.

Not to mention, my "gift" is right around the corner...so combine all of these things together...and I've been a snappy emotional delight.



Now, I'm not saying that I'm giving all of this stuff up forever, but I'd like to majorly change some of my unhealthy habits.

Maybe I'll just have a glass of wine....why can't my favorite bar sell organic wine? At least I wouldn't feel so guilty.

I'm reading a book called Skinny Bitch (Auth- Rory Freedman & Kim Barnouin, Pub - Running Press), and although the book basically preaches a vegan lifestyle, there are allot of really helpful hints and eye-opening facts about the shit that we put into our bodies.



I'm trying very hard to stay away from the worst crap (diet sodas, fast food, etc) but I can't sit here and say I'm never going to eat meat or enjoy a vodka cranberry again.

Well...I guess I'll go for a walk now. Please wish me luck on being moderately good this weekend!!

Blind Item - Irked

Alright...so, I received a pretty idealistic and pseudo-douchey response from a certain comedian after I asked him a slightly presumptuous and possibly insulting (with no insult purposely intended) question. I'm not blind to the fact that as comedians, most of us are fucked in the head, and the majority can be douchey...but this one in particular is just really bothering me. I know I should just build a bridge and get over it, and I've tried...for over a week now...and I'm still thinking about it (I would just call my therapist who already knows that I am a person who picks through and over analyzes everything, but I decided to give him a break and blog about it instead - lucky you!!) I think I just need to get it off my chest.

To be perfectly fair and honest...I can't figure out if I'm more bothered that I may have insulted someone and that I truly should have known this comedian would most likely turn the show down...or if it was the fact that this is the first time a fellow comedian has made me feel like he/she thinks they are much better than my level of comedian and that I should have known better. In all honesty, I'm not totally sure that this comedian actually intended to make me feel that way...but that was definitely the end result.

I am not a Booker. I do not care to ever become a Booker, however, a few of us local comedians were offered a chance to book the beautiful Bagdad Theater in Portland's Hawthorne District. Many wonderful comedians have worked this Theater (Just to name a few - Mad TV's Matt Braugner, Marc Maron, Andy Kindler, Eugene Mirman, and many, many more) so we were excited to get the chance to invite even more talent to this stage.



Our main goal is to bring a draw (a "big name" or someone that people go to see) because the deal we have with the theater is a door deal (sometimes in door deals, you take the whole door-ticket sales-but we're only getting a percentage) and sometimes, door deals can suck. For instance, if we're selling tickets for $3-$5 a head, and only 50 people come to the show, after you split the money between the comedians...they're left with little, and you're most likely left with none. Now, with that being said...the Bagdad says it seats up to 700. So, with a big name, you could potentially make some money, but of course, it's never a guarantee (as we cannot force people to show up). We were ready to start booking some names and making comedy at the Bagdad come back to life!

I was contemplating who I was going to attempt to book for the July 18th show. There are some big names in Portland who would do it...but they're either out of town or they've done it before (and I sort of wanted to give the audience something new). Now, please keep in mind, that when I say big names, I mean these guys have been on T.V., they've had their go at Last Comic Standing, they've been on Comedy Central, Showtime, etc. and make good money at it. They love comedy, and if they happen to be in town on a night where we're doing comedy at the Bagdad, they would do the show regardless of the fact that they may walk out of the theater with a measly $60. They would do the show not only because they love comedy and stage time is always nice, they would also do it to practice new material, and to help the comedy community.

I was flipping through my myspace friends and a particular person (who will now further be referred to as 'they' and 'them'- you know...because this blog is SOOO widely read and everyone might care enough to try to figure it out hahaha) caught my eye. I knew that they used to, and may still live in the Northwest. They had been on (or may still be) on Last Comic Standing. I watched the first episode where they made it past the auditions, and almost had a little pride that this person was reppin' the NW because they always seemed like a cool person. Granted, I wasn't able to follow anymore of the season, so I was ignorant to the fact that this person was/is actually doing very well.

My first e-mail to them:
Hi(name)!-
My name is Veronica Heath and I'm a Portland Comedian (among other things). A few comics and I were handed the booking arrangements for the Bagdad Theater out here in East Portland. We are trying to figure out who to book for our July 18th one-nighter, and you happened to pop up on the computer screen, so I thought I'd ask you.

I know you just headlined in Washington, but I'm not sure if you are living in California now or not? (Your myspace says L.A., but I know you were a NW comic - we have a few mutual friends, but I keep forgetting to ask them).

Anyhow, I'm not sure if you prefer a different way of contacting you for bookings, if so, please let me know, but I'll go ahead and tell you the details that we know. We would love for you to headline the Bagdad Theater on July 18th. The theater seats approx. 400 people. Here's the sucky part: We basically have a door deal with the theater. They guarantee us $60, or the door - whichever is more. Usually the door is more, and with you headlining, we'd probably get a draw.

Thanks for taking the time to read this, and please let me know if you're interested!

(I'm a comedian, not a Booker, so I hope I asked you correctly) : )

Thanks!
Veronica


(Now...keep in mind, I was asking this person under the assumption that they were possibly back in the NW, and weren't working too much as only one show was on their calendar...also, I didn't realize that the theater sat 700 people at this time, I thought it was more like 400...I know, I know, I should have done better research)


Their Response:
well i live in hollywood now.
My schedule is crazy, I would love to help you guys out and dont wanna sound like a sell out but I couldnt do it without knowing Im gonna make at least $2,000.00.
My booking agents charge double that for collages. I dont know what you guys had for a budget but thats my rate at CHEAPEST.
Im sorry if that is too much and understand if you cant make it work.

(Did they really just tell me how much they makes per show?? Seriously? Especially after me saying that it's a door deal and that the theater is only offering us a shitty $60 guarantee?? I work with comedians who have done much more work than this person (Television and media-wise) and who make very good money, and I have never seen them tell a comedian who was attempting to book a room how much money they make in their rejection. Honestly, if this comedian would have just left it at "I do live in Hollywood now, so I wont be able to do the show" I would not be bothered one bit.)

My Final Response:
No problem...just asking, I wouldn't have asked if I knew you were living down south. I didn't see any shows besides the few at (a comedy club) on your calendar, so I didn't think it'd hurt to ask.

Thanks for your time,
Veronica


See, now I feel better. Thank you to any of you that actually read this whole thing. I know that this kind of stuff happens all the time, and I've already dealt with plenty of dicky-assholes and shitty situations in this industry, but for some reason, this person always seemed like they'd be different. Maybe because the mutual comedian friends we have are so kick-ass, not sure. I have already dealt with and I know that many more disapointments are to come from this industry...and I cand handle them, deal with them, and let them go...this one just happened to stick.

After re-reading what I wrote...I guess the comedian wasn't truly intending to come off as a dick. Maybe what bothered me is that I learned a lesson on booking, and he didn't learn squat..but then again, what do I know? I'm not the one making $4,000 at 'collages'.

PRCM Show Launch!

It's finally here! The launch of the Pop-Rock Candy Mountain Show!! The guests for this show are:
Mary Birdsong (Reno 911)
Kate Flanery (The Office)
Steve Agee (Sarah Silverman Program)
and
Wisely

Just go to www.poprockcandymountain.com to listen! These shows will be archived and eventually put on iTunes for listening in the future.

(Sidenote for a few of you that have asked, next Tuesday - July 8th will be my 'co-host debut' - it's the show with Maria, Mark, and Andy!)

Neverending Birthday

Wow...what a long week. Sorry I've haven't posted in a few days, i'ts been crazy.

First, I had a birthday party which turned into an almost 2 week festival of alcohol, faux marriage proposals, kareoke, enough taco bell fire sauce to feed a small country, megatouch, nachos, and comedy...but man, was it worth it. You know when you're a little girl (or an about-to-be 26 year old) and you wish that you could have a Unicorn Themed Party??? Yeah, well...thanks to comedy mom, this dream came true...they were everywhere.



even on the blow things!



and I got 26 spankings!!!



all in all...it was the neverending birthday party...but tonight...I'm looking forward to sleep...yeah, that'll be nice....

Podcastic 2!

If you're at all familiar with VH1's Best Week Ever or any of their other shows that include panelists, than you'd be familiar with tonights Podcast Guests Angela Shelton and Frances Callier, who make up the comedic duo, Frangela.



In researching Frangela, I found out that amoung being a part of or involved in a plethra of T.V., radio, and Improv shows, they met in Chicago when they were neighbors and both were members of The Second City...I am so jealous.

These ladies always crack me up...they should be allot of fun to talk to.



Frangela's myspace page:
www.myspace.com/therealfrangela